Listen up, darlings—Ms. Rizzlerina is here to spill the sparkling tea and take you on a road trip so fabulous, even the Kardashians would ditch their jets and buckle up in a vintage convertible just to vibe with the aesthetic. Yes, honey, I’m talking about the ultimate cross-country glow-up: America’s longest highway, US Route 20. Pack your glitter, fluff your feathers, and grab those oversized shades—because this is no ordinary road. This is a coast-to-coast catwalk served hot and fast over 3,365 miles of pure, star-spangled slayage.
Let’s start at mile zero, baby—Massachusetts. Boston, to be precise. Home of Harvard brains, clam chowder, and the kind of cobblestone charm that screams “historic, but make it haute couture.” But don’t linger too long in the Ivy League drama. We’ve got miles to slay.
Cue the GPS, and we’re headed west, honey. Through New York, where the lights of Broadway fade into upstate forests so moody, even Lana Del Rey would write a new album. Slide into Pennsylvania next (a.k.a. America’s underrated queen), where you can swap selfies with steel bridges and vintage diners straight out of a Lana Turner movie. Aesthetic overload? Just wait.
Ohio struts in next, wearing her Midwestern modesty like a $3 thrift fit that turns out to be vintage Dior. Keep rolling through Indiana and Illinois, where every cornfield is basically nature’s runway—tall, golden, and clearly waving to you like paparazzi.
And then comes Iowa, where the highway glides past towns so cute and charming it’s as if Hallmark’s casting department had a say in the geography. Think white picket fences, Fourth of July parades, and pies that are worthy of a Southern Belle’s approval (or at least my sweet tooth’s).
Now don’t drop your lipstick just yet, because here comes Nebraska, the land of big skies and even bigger energy. Slide into Wyoming like you’re making an entrance at the Met Gala—dramatic, windswept, and absolutely unforgettable. That mountain air? Fresh enough to wake a tired influencer from her third Red Bull nap.
When you cross into Montana, the VIBES turn full Yellowstone but make it fashion. Endless landscapes, majestic mountains, and bison with better blowouts than half of L.A. Talk about giving Mother Nature a standing ovation.
Next, it’s Idaho. And baby, this state’s not just about potatoes. We’re talking lakes, charming towns, and a natural beauty rivaling Gisele on a good hair day. From there, put your phone on portrait mode because we’re heading into Oregon, the FINAL stop on this coast-to-coast carpet strut—and oh, it’s lush, green, and moody in all the best ways. The endpoint? Newport, darling. Beach breeze, salty waves, and epic sunsets that practically scream, “I made it, and I did it with style!”
In total, this glammed-up journey slices through 12 states, leaving a trail of tire tracks and stardust. It’s no ordinary drive—it’s a rolling red carpet, stretching across the heart of America and dripping in main character energy.
So what’s the move, crew? Gas up the convertible, cue the playlist (heavy on Beyoncé, please), and throw on your most camera-ready ‘fit. Because Route 20 isn’t just a road—it’s a full-blown lifestyle. A glam-gritty, all-American odyssey from sea to shining slay.
Stay fabulous, my road-tripping royalty—and let the vibes roll.
—Ms. Rizzlerina
