🚀 Welcome to Starbase: Elon Musk’s Moonshot at Urban Manifest Destiny 🚀
Listen up, Earthlings—and Texans especially—because the truth’s about to launch faster than a Falcon Heavy on a caffeine drip: Elon Musk just took a giant leap for Muskkind, and he’s dragging a patch of dusty Texas desert right along with him. That’s right—SpaceX’s private rocket playground in Boca Chica is now on the fast-track to becoming… a city. And not just any city. A Musk-city. Welcome to “Starbase.”
Oh, you thought democracy was built on the will of the people? Think again, cowboy. Because in Starbase, the overwhelming majority of “residents” who voted to incorporate the area into a municipality also happen to be… wait for it… employees of Musk’s own SpaceX. That’s like hosting an election in Willy Wonka’s factory and being shocked when the Oompa Loompas unanimously vote for mandatory chocolate rations.
The game’s on, and Elon ain’t just playing—he’s rewriting the rulebook.
Now don’t get me wrong: I respect audacity. I endorse empire. But let’s call this moon crater what it really is—a corporate colony in Musk cosplay. You don’t birth a city from scratch by accident, folks. You do it because power doesn’t wait for permits, and Elon’s America is frontier land for billionaires who prefer low taxes and high ambition.
Point blank: They aren’t building a city for the people. They’re building a launchpad for private governance. A techno-futurist Testbedopolis where the streetlights are smart, the neighbors don’t vote, and the mayor’s office probably takes Dogecoin.
Take it from me—I’ve waded through countless beltway backrooms and shadowy power corridors—but never have I seen a municipality practically fall out of the sky like this. No zoning controversy. No town hall grillings. Just a few thumbs up from badge-laminated workers in SpaceX windbreakers. Boom—it’s a city.
Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein. Elon Musk is dropping Starbase.
But let’s get one thing clear: we’re not just talking about a small town with big dreams. Oh no, this is Musk’s Martian colony dress rehearsal. A libertarian city-state with rockets in the backyard and maybe a private army of Boston Dynamics robot dogs in the HOA.
And I’ve got questions—big ones.
Will Starbase have due process, or just drone surveillance and YouTube livestream accountability panels? Does the city council wear spacesuits? What happens when a local pothole annoys Elon—will it get filled with molten steel or simply deleted from the Tesla GPS?
You laugh now, but this ain’t fiction—it’s the new frontier of billionaire feudalism. Forget Silicon Valley. We’ve entered an era where tech kings don’t just build companies. They build countries. Strip away the spectacle and you’ve got the same empire playbook Caesar used, with a W-LAN upgrade and reusable rockets.
Let’s be clear—this isn’t just a town. It’s a test. A prototype for what happens when the unelected take flight and plant their flag in the sand, then vote themselves into legitimacy.
You can gripe, you can moan, or you can admit what’s happening: Musk saw your rules and said “nah, I’ll terraform my own.”
And in a country where wealth walks taller than law, who’s gonna stop him?
Not Texas. They handed him the keys.
Not Washington. They’re too busy tweeting policy platitudes.
And not the people—because the only voices in Starbase are paid by the man building the launchpad.
So buckle up, folks. The future isn’t just knocking—it’s crash-landing in Rio Grande soil, wearing a SpaceX badge and dreaming of Mars.
In Starbase, the revolution won’t be televised.
It’ll be livestreamed… in 4K… with ads for Neuralink.
— Mr. 47 🚀
