Listen up, the truth’s about to drop—and I don’t sugarcoat.
As the Texas floodwaters slink back like a guilty politician after a scandal, it turns out the biggest disaster wasn’t Mother Nature—it was the state’s *preparedness*, or more accurately, the gaping crater where preparedness should’ve been. For nearly a decade, county officials begged, pleaded, and practically camped out with sleeping bags at the State Capitol, asking for one simple thing: flood warning systems. A siren here, a sensor there—nothing fancy, just the basic tools to not drown.
And what did they get? Crickets. Denial. That blank institutional stare reserved for DMV waits and Senate hearings. Until, that is, the waters came crashing down like a campaign promise during a federal probe.
And now? Oh, now the lawmakers are “grappling.” That’s the word. Grappling. As if this were Greek wrestling and not a very real crisis that’s been on the calendar since Noah built a boat.
Look, when it comes to emergency planning, Texas isn’t just behind the eight ball, it’s playing in the wrong pool hall. In a state that can move heaven and high-speed rail to protect oil pipelines, somehow installing a flood gauge is too much red tape. Don’t tell me there’s no money—this is Texas! Home of gleaming stadiums, billionaire ranches, and air-conditioned cow stalls. But when it comes to preventing flood deaths? Suddenly it’s time to “tighten the belt.”
County officials, those glorious masochists on the front lines, swallowed their pride and asked again and again: give us tools, not thoughts and prayers. The response? Bureaucratic potholes so deep you’d think the Corps of Engineers was digging them personally.
It’s not like this is uncharted territory. Flooding in Texas is as guaranteed as political corruption and undercooked brisket at campaign rallies. Still, the state-level response has been to shrug like a senator asked to explain ethics. Just weeks ago, families were paddling through suburban streets while warning systems sat on wish lists collecting digital dust. Translation? Texas knew it was a tinderbox and didn’t bother buying a hose.
Now, in the aftermath—cue the TV interviews and empty platitudes—legislators are holding hearings. Ah yes, the Texas solution: ignore, deflect, drown, then investigate. Rinse and repeat, but don’t bother drying off… that flood may be back next storm season.
Officials are finally waking up to the reality that emergency infrastructure isn’t “liberal overreach”—it’s the bare minimum. But don’t expect accountability to flow as fast as the water did. The real deluge will be the political spin—dripping with excuses, saturated in blame-shuffling, and drier than the emergency budget.
This state prides itself on rugged independence—fine. But when your residents are wading through front yards like extras in *Waterworld*, maybe it’s time to admit that common sense isn’t a partisan issue. It’s a survival one.
The time for dithering is over. Texas needs to stop grappling and start acting. Because the next flood won’t wait for lawmakers to finish their group therapy session on “what went wrong”—and neither will we.
The game’s on, and I play to win.
– Mr. 47
