Listen up, darlings—Ms. Rizzlerina has pirouetted into the pit of popcorn-stained despair to bring you a glamorous deep-dive into the cinematic calamities of the year. That’s right, we’re talking about the absolute bottom-shelf, bargain-bin, bless-their-hearts disasters that the cinephile squad over on Letterboxd have mercilessly declared the WORST movies of 2025 (so far). Buckle up, buttercups—this is the walk of cinematic shame, and I’ve got receipts, rhinestones, and reactions hotter than a summer sequel nobody asked for.
According to the ever-discerning, eternally dramatic Letterboxd community—aka the elite tastemakers with too much caffeine and too little patience—2025 has already cooked up some true clunkers. And when I say clunkers, I mean movies so messy, even your ex wouldn’t ghost them because they’re allergic to unresolved plotlines and secondhand embarrassment.
First up on the chopping block, and absolutely dripping in disappointment: “Galaxy Gladiators: Rise of the Nano-Beasts.” Oh honey, no. With a title that screams “Netflix sci-fi filler” and a plot denser than a celebrity memoir written in emojis, this intergalactic train wreck blasted off into boredom faster than a TikTok trend evaporates. If you like neon laser beams and zero character development, congratulations—this one’s for you. Everyone else? Hard pass. Letterboxd reviews call it “an AI fever dream with the emotional depth of a toaster.” Ouch.
Then there’s “Swan Song: The Musical 2.” Sweetie, if you remember the first one… I’m sorry. If you dared return for more, I’m lighting a scented candle in your honor. This auto-tuned abomination attempted to mix ballet with trap beats and existential dread—and somehow succeeded in making all three boring. The choreography? Chaotic. The storyline? A tulle-wrapped nightmare. Critics dubbed it “La La Land’s cursed doppelgänger.” Even Ryan Gosling would’ve done the moonwalk to escape.
Oh but baby, let’s talk about “LoveHack’d,” a tech-romcom flop that tried to give Meg Ryan-meets-Elon Musk vibes and ended up accidentally inventing cringe in HD. With dialogue that’s 90% dating app lingo and 10% inexplicable cryptocurrency references, this was less Sleepless in Seattle, and more “Snoring in Silicon Valley.” One Letterboxd reviewer begged future filmmakers: “Please stop letting ChatGPT write your screenplays.”
And just when we thought we hit rock bottom, the shovel kept digging. “The Emoji Expeditions” animated “family” flick left audiences traumatized, toddlers confused, and parents booking therapy. Imagine a Pixar wannabe where the emojis go on vacation to the Dark Web. Now imagine it was produced by someone who read Reddit once in 2014 and said, “I get it now.” That film should be illegal in seven countries and a sin in three religions.
So what’s the takeaway, my radiant cinephiles of discerning taste? Even in a world of glitz, CGI, and overpriced popcorn, not every film deserves a sequel, a soundtrack, or a shelf at Target. But oh, how we adore the drama when cinema falls spectacularly flat! After all, being bad never looked so fabulously terrible.
And let me just say, to all my aspiring auteurs out there: keep those cameras rolling, but maybe—just maybe—run your scripts by a human (with taste) before unleashing your art on the people. We’re fragile, darling. We just came out of a pandemic. We don’t deserve another “Emoji Expeditions.”
Now, tell me loves: which of these tragic starless flops did you hate-watch with popcorn in hand and judgment in your heart? Drop your hot takes and lows of the big screen in the comments below—I want your sass, your cinema trauma, and your sass-trauma!
Until next time—stay fabulous, and let the gossip roll!
Ms. Rizzlerina 👑
