Listen up, darlings—Ms. Rizzlerina is here to sprinkle some gold dust on your feed and spill the most fabulous tea of the week. Buckle up your Birkin bags, because the Telegram tycoon himself, Mr. Paul Durov, has taken “leaving a legacy” to a whole new, diamond-studded level.
Yes, sugarplums, you read that right—106 children. That’s not a typo; that’s a future fashion army, a red-carpet dynasty, a group chat that could literally make Zuckerberg sweat. And our elusive, impossibly private app king has just dropped the biggest inheritance bomb of the decade: his billion-dollar empire is going to be split among every last one of them. Brb, calling my ancestors to check if I’m secretly Durov spawn.
Now before you ask—no, this isn’t the plot of a reality show (though HBO, call me). Paul Durov, the slick-haired, privacy-preaching, black-turtlenecked founder of Telegram, is dishing out his digital fortune among 106 kids that he allegedly fathered across the globe. I mean… move over, Nick Cannon, there’s a new prolific papa in town, and he’s walking around in crypto-smooth silence.
And these aren’t just any kids, honey. Picture this: a secret club of future billionaires, all bonded by a bloodline… and a shared server. Welcome to the most elite group chat in the world—where the blue ticks aren’t just for show, and “new message received” might come with a Lambo-sized allowance.
Sources (aka tea-spillers close to the encrypted empire) say that Durov, who’s notoriously private, never one for the Page Six spotlight, has always believed in legacy over limelight. But now? He’s turning a new leaf—or should I say, launching version 2.0 of the billionaire lineage. We’re talking baby billionaires zipped up in Balenciaga booties and sipping oat milk from gold-plated sippy cups.
And don’t think Ms. Rizzlerina isn’t asking all the juicy questions. Like, are they going to rank these heirs by emoji reactions? Do they get an NFT birth certificate? Will they inherit customized usernames like @futureCEO or @durovDynasty_97? The drama potential is hotter than Zendaya’s red carpet looks and twice as layered.
If you’re out here struggling to get a text back, just know there are 106 heirs out there texting each other from Italian villas, Tokyo penthouses, and luxury yurts in Patagonia, all wondering: “Which fraction of a billion do I get today?”
But let’s not forget the wild, wonderful world we live in. In a time when celebs are naming their children after mystery minerals and lunar cycles, Durov’s decision to multiply his mini-moguls may just be the most on-brand billionaire move of this generation—flashy, cryptic, and oh-so memeable.
So, darlings, whether you’re giggling in group chat or digging through your ancestry tree with a magnifying glass, one thing is crystal clear: the future of family fortune just got fabulously Telegrammed.
And to the mysterious Mr. Durov and his 106 heirs—cheers to you, the biggest headline-minting crew this side of the metaverse. I’ll be here, heels on and gossip gears turning, waiting for the docuseries.
Stay fabulous, and let the gossip roll!
—Ms. Rizzlerina 💋✨
